Bull

I was just randomly thinking about politeness. By politeness i mean when people tell you what you want to hear. For instance, after your boyfriend dumps you and your feeling really down and your friend says 'dont worry, your better off without him' when what they are really thinking is 'wow i thought they were going to be together forever!'. Obviously people do it to be kind, to help the person heal or feel better with their words. Which is all well and good!

What i dont get is why we cant just say the truth. Using the boyfriend example again you don't have to be rude and say 'my god your a heffer no ones going to love you again' but you could say 'i really didnt see that one coming and im really sorry its happened!'.

This came about because i was thinking about my current situation in which i do not have a teaching job for seprember and most of my driends do. And so i find myself in the position whrre my future is going ti be supply work. Now i hate when people say 'its good experience' or 'you make more money' (you dont btw) id rather people say 'crap, hope you find a job soon.'

I just think theres a way to put a spin on the truth and i really dislike when people "try to make me feel better" in that condesending manner.

Rant is done (if you can call it that).

God bless and good night :) x

Projecting

Right, now we get onto the real reason why I decided that tonight I would finally blog for the first time since I got home from Holiday. Since I've been back I haven't stopped socially! The first night I went to watch harry potter (amazing), next night I went out for dinner, next night I went to a friends house for takeaway and a film, next night dinner and harry potter (yes again), next night school play and tonight dinner. This officially continues until friday. I have never known a time in my life where I have been so socially active. Anyway this post isnt really about my social life directly, I'm just explaining why I havent blogged for a while.

Now my blackberry has recently stopped working (twat) and so therefore as an early birthday present I asked my mum if she could please buy me a new one. Obviously today was the wrong day to ask, because she was NOT in a good mood. Obviously something bad had happened at work or even something minor on the bus, but the fact is that she turned around and projected (now do you see where the title comes in) her issues onto me. Now I had a fabulous day, shopping, dining, and just generally shooting the breeze, so it took me a long time to loose my temper. But eventually I was sick of being told off like a child so I lost it good. Anyway, eventually she left me alone after a few choice words on my part.

Basically this post is about (yeah I'm finally getting to the point) if you have an issue with someone, sort it out with them, don't take it with you and pass it on to the next person! Because now I bet im going to be really rude to someone (if i havent already) and they cycle will be neverending).

Anyway sad times. Now I want to go to bed.

x

Tunisia 2011

So I never did a Tunisia post, and I doubt I ever will to be honest. There was a lot that happened in Tunisia that I would like to stay close to me and don't necessarily want to share it with the world. But I just wanted to do a post that acknowledged that I really enjoyed my time there, and would love to go back! Hopefully I will get a chance too next year!

Parking fine

So guys, today I got my first parking fine. Apparently, I drove in a bus lane in Kingston upon Thames. Anyway I went on google maps to see where I drove in a bus lane and it turns out the whole road was a bus lane! Don't know how I missed that! So it is my own stupid fault! Ah well!

Anyway, interestingly, last night I was talking to my mum about how whenever I'm about to get money, I always have to spend it on some big thing. For instance, last time I worked at the holiday club, I had to buy a new battery for my laptop because it broke. So I didn't get a chance to enjoy my money. So I was saying to my mum that I was surprised that nothing had come up yet, because I have been working to get some holiday money. Anyway, I wake up this morning and what do I find? A parking fine, lovely jubly! So I have to spend some money on that now! The life of a student in England sucks!

Day 28, 29 & 30

Because I am going on holiday tomorrow, I thought I would do the last couple of days of my 30 day challenge now so that I stay consistent! So I guess I have come to the end of my 30 day challenge, its been real, I hope you've all enjoyed reading!

Day 28 - Something that you miss
I miss my amazing sisters Tara and Bella. I would really love either to get a job during the summer or somehow get enough money to be able to go and visit them for christmas. It's been a year (almost) since I saw them last!

Day 29 - Goals for the next 30 days
- To enjoy my holiday
- To make some money to tide me over the summer
- To keep looking for a job (and hopefully get one)
- To enjoy life and stop being such a worrywort!

Day 30 - Your highs and lows of the month
I'll do this for 5th June to the 5th July.
Highs
- Getting a B on school experience
- Finishing school experience
- Passing my degree with a 2:1
- Graduation ball (from what I remember)
- Working at the after school club

Lows
- Getting my first parking fine (bollocks)
- School experience
- Last boring ass lecture
- Getting the flu
- Getting food poisoning

So all in all it seems like I had a pretty mixed month. I have to say that is how my life is going at the moment, very mixed, nothing overly good, nothing overly bad. CAN SOMETHING REALLY GOOD HAPPEN NOW PLEASE? So bored of the mundane life I'm living!

Day 27 - A problem that you have had

Money. Pounds, euro, dollars, dinar, naira, cedi, baht, yuan. What ever currency you spend, the lack of money is a definitive problem. I know the saying is 'more money, more problems' but I find if you don't have money, thats an even bigger problem.

Example 1: I am going on holiday on Wednesday and had no spending money until recently.
Example 2: When I come back from holiday, I have no idea how I am going to put petrol in my car.
Example 3: I really wanted to go to Manchester this summer but this isn't going to happen because I don't have any money.

e.t.c e.t.c e.t.c

To make matters worse, I don't have a job lined up for Septemeber, so I don't have a clue how I am going to make ends meet!

Well you did ask...

Chat up lines - the last one is my fave x

Is that the sun coming up... or is that just you lighting up my world?

Baby, you are everything I never knew I always wanted.

If kisses were snowflakes, I'd send you a blizzard.

Girl, your body is a wonderland, and I want to be Alice so that I can run around all over you.

You are so hot you make the windows fog.

Some say there are 7 wonders in the world. Some say there are more. Some say everything in life is a wonder. But to me, There is only one....You!

I saw a flower this morning and I thought it was the most beutiful thing I've ever seen until a gazed upon you.

I know I dont have a chance, but I just wanted to hear an angel talk.

If you were a pill I'd overdose.

I hope your day is as radiant as your smile.

Looking at a rose is like looking at your beautiful face.

I bet my tongue can beat up your tongue.

When I saw your face I thought I died and went to heaven.

Your lips look so lonely, Would they like to meet mine?

Hey you almost killed me! I saw you and forgot how to breathe.

Excuse me, can you empty your pockets? I believe you have stolen my heart.

What is the cross between the moon and the stars? You

I would give up eterinity to be with you.

Is there an airport near by or is that my heart taking off?

I got skittles in my mouth... wanna taste the rainbow?

Yesterday, I tried to paint you, but I couldn't... the colors weren't beautiful enough.

Do you have some water? 'Cause you set my heart on fire.

There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.

Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!

I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away.

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!

If you were a booger I'd pick you first.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

That shirt is very becoming on you. But if I was on you, I'd be coming to ;)

Blogging

So its a boring Sunday night, I'm lying in bed thinking about what I can do to alleviate my boredom. So I think 'hmmm I'll read my really old blog posts'. Imagine my shock when I realise I actually used to put in effort in my posts and I used to enjoy spilling my feelings somewhere! And they actually used to mean something to someone other than me! And I used to be proud of them and post them on facebook!

I remember I started this blog to be a sort of diary for me, where I shared my opinions on matters and talked about how I felt. Either I am now incapable of doing this or I have become so secretive that I feel like I have to conceal matters at all times.

I would really like to begin to write in my blog again and frequently! Especially over the summer where I may not have much to do!

Lets hope I stick to this...

Day 23 Error

OH MY GOD! How stupid could I be? When I did my day 23 - five guys you find attractive I forgot my future husband! What a crime! So in my original post I put Chris Brown (yum), Taye Diggs (chocolate), Michael Ealy (his eyes!), Soulja boy (would you believe?) and Bow wow. Now while all these brothers are FINNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE, I actually forgot my one true love, Mr Patrick Okogwu otherwise known as Tinie Tempah! So this is an apology post to him, just to let him know that I still got him!



*sighs* He's gorgeous :) x

Day 26 - What kind of person attracts you

Someone with a gorgeous smile, good sense of humour, loves to enjoy themselves but knows when to be serious. Has the same values as me, quite laid back but not too laid back, is able to compromise, kind, caring, treats me right.

That's not too much to ask for right?

:) x

Degree classification

So today was the day I finally recieved my grades in the post! I will let the letter explain itself!



I DID IT! 2.1 baby, couldn't believe my eyes! So happy that I have finally finished my degree!

WOOHOO GO ME!

This has been a good year so far, in that I passed my driving test and I now passed my degree! Now I have to get a job and then this will officially have been the best year of my life!

Thanks all that have supported me through this time! It was very much appreciated and I love you all!

:) x

Day 25 - Someone who fascinates you and why

Everyone who knows me knows the answer to this.

CHRISTINA AGUILERA



I am fascinated by her because not only is she beautiful, but her voice is AMAZING, and she is an inspiration to all women! Love her!

<3 x

Graduation Ball

Last night was my graduation ball, and it was so amazing! We arrived at the venue all dressed up, looking very ladylike and feeling very comfortable. We drank champagne, ate food, and generally had a smashing time! Never wanted it to end!

LOL. I wish that was how my night went! Instead, the girls and I had rented a hotel room, in which we had planned to have pre drinks. Little did I know that predrinks would turn into getting way too drunk too early! When I got to the venue, I have no idea what happened, although little flashes keep on coming back to me, and to make matters worse I didn't eat any food because I thought I would throw up and I was hungry when I got back to the hotel, but of course there was no takeaways still open. So I had a sore stomach all night! This was then joined by this omega flu that I seem to have picked up from somewhere, and the cramp in my leg that made me scream out in the middle of the night.

Then I woke up in the morning and I felt way better!

NOT IN THE WORLD OF RACHEL! I woke up still feeling sick, and went for the complimentary breakfast at the hotel. I had to keep running to the toilet thinking I would throw up and then eventually I did! Which then allowed me to eat breakfast and keep it down! Worse hangover ever commenced!

I WILL NEVER DRINK AGAIN!

Day 23 & 24

Yesterday was my graduation ball, therefore I had no time to blog yesterday. (See next post for more info on the ball).

Day 23 - Give pictures of 5 guys who are famous who you find attractive

In no particular order:

Day 24 - Your favourite movie and what its about
I have many favourite movies but the first one that springs to mind whenever I hear this question is 'The Notebook'. Its a basic love story, star-crossed lovers e.t.c. with a bit of a twist. I love it because its so sweet and such an accurate representation of love, the actors have so much chemistry its unbelievable! Oh and also its got Rachel McAdams in it, whom I love!

:) x

Day 22 - How have you changed in the past 2 years?

This is a lovely question. Personally I feel I have changed immesnely in the last 2 years, not only physically but mentally too. Physically, my hair colour is different and the length of my hair is different. I've lost a stone. My boobs have grown. Mentally, I feel more confident about myself, less looking for a guy to sort out my problems, I am a qualified teacher and have grown as a teacher!

:)

x

Day 21 - One of your favourite shows

This is like the post of my dreams lol. My favourite show is...



Yes, that's right! Grey's anatomy! It has the best storylines, most interesting characters (apart from Meredith Grey, ugh), its a tearjearker too, and I just love to watch it!

30 day challenge: Days 3 - 20

So clearly I havent been bothered, nor have I had time to do this challenge, so I am just going to pack all the posts I've missed into one big post! Enjoy!

Day 3 - Your views on drugs and alcohol
I enjoy drinking but have never taken drugs. To be fair I believe that people are gonna do what they want to do an it's not up to me to judge them. Only God can do that.

Day 4 - Your views on religion
I believe in God. Simples.

Day 5 - A Time you thought about ending your life.
An oh so dramatic title. There was briefly a time in high school where I guess I just didnt want to be there anymore because I hated it so much, so I thought about it, and then decided against it. Henceforth, until this day, I am still here :D x

Day 6 - Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.
This should be highly interesting...

1. I love Christina Aguilera. Like love her. Like mega heart her.
2. I can be a loner but also love interacting with people.
3. My fave colour is Green.
4. My nickname is Rae-Rae Green due to fact 3 and fact 5.
5. I love F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
6. I am trying to grow my hair out but this has just been ruined by the hairdresser who insisted on taking 3 inches off my hair when I went for a haircut. Heffer.
7. I love music. And I love blaring music in my car and having my own private party.
8. It took me 3 tries to pass my driving test. On automatic.
9. When I say I am going to do something, 9 times out of 10 I do it. The other time is usually beyond my control.
10. I like to think I'm tougher than I probably actually am.
11. I got bullied in High School
12. I consider myself to be one of the 'mandem'.
13. I love to belt out songs by amazing singers as if I am just as amazing. LOL.
14. I am too trusting and forgiving.
15. I would really like a teaching job and my own class now please :)
16. I love love
17. I am looking through my sisters list and it is helping me do my own. LOL.
18. I went up two cup sizes in a year and now I have to buy extra big clothes just to fit over the twins. No thanks.
19. I only learned to cook at uni.
20. I am not a selfish person.
21. But I do complain a hell of a lot. That's my way of unleashing pent up energy.
22. I want 6 kids. Or more.
23. I also want to foster.
24. I love driving.
25. I am rubbish at keeping in touch.
26. I can be pretty straightforward. Ask me something, and I'll give you an honest answer.
27. Even at 22 years of age, I still feel very young, vulnerable and insecure at times.
28. My sister are my best friends. Wish I could see them more often.
29. I enjoy flirting.
30. I have a dirty mind.

THAT WAS HARD!

Day 7 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.
I am a virgo *looks up stuff about virgo's personality*...

Modest and shy
Meticulous and reliable
Practical and diligent
Intelligent and analytical
Fussy and a worrier
Overcritical and harsh
Perfectionist and conservative
(From: http://www.astrology-online.com/virgo.htm)

Well I'm definately meticulous and reliable. Not so sure about the practical part, depends on what sense I suppose. Diligent and intelligent I am. Analytical, hell NO. I always got bad grades for not being analytical enough! I am definately fussy and I worry way too much for my own good. I don't think I'm overcritical but I can be a bit harsh at times. Definately a perfectionist but as far from conservative as can be!

Day 8 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life
I reckon this will be the day I graduate. 31st of October 2011. Good times!

Day 9 - How you hope your future will be like
I swear I've already answered this. I would like my future to lack strife and be full of happiness.

Day 10 - Discuss your first love and first kiss.
First love. I won't say names here but I met him when I was 17 in Manchester. And it was a crazy relationship that should never have happened and to this day I will never understand how it started and how it spiraled so out of control. I think it's so amazing how stupid a person can be to fall in love with a person that treats them like dirt. But I did!

First kiss. Awww it was when I was in Year 9 and a boy told me to meet him after school in the flats near my school. We chatted for a while and then we had the moment and kissed. It was all so very cute and coy. Awwww.

Day 11 - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up
Jessie J - I need this
Mark Ronson and Amy Winehouse - Valerie
Jasmine Sullivan - Bust your windows
Victizzle - My girl feat Leke
Britney Spears - Till the world ends
Fred Hammond - Bread of Life
Christina Aguilera - Nasty
Joss Stone - Tell me what we're gonna do now
Guvna B - Echo
Robyn - Bum like you

Day 12 - Bullet your whole day
- Woke up at 7
- Got ready and left the house at 8
- Drove to uni
- Sat through a 1 and a half hour lecture
- Went to the library and had a ham salad baguette
- Got told off in the library for being too loud
- Sat outside the library and enjoyed the sun
- Went to another 1 and a half hour lecture
- Drew pictures of my friends
- Went and sat in the sun again
- Went into Kingston town centre
- Bought some earrings from topshop
- Drove to brent cross
- Bought some liquid eyeliner and mascara
- Went to say hello to a friend where he works
- Drove home
- Had dinner
- Started doing this

Day 13 - Somewhere you'd like to move or visit
I love Britain so I wouldn't like to move anywhere else but here. But if we are talking about visit then there are loads of places: Ghana, Kenya, Australia, Greece, Italy, Mexico, e.t.c the list is endless!

Day 14 - Your earliest memory
Is of me sitting outside our flats in a paddling pool. I have no idea why this is my first memory but it is. I must have been about 4.

Day 15 - Your favourite tumblrs
Because I don't really use tumblr I am gonna ignore this one.


Day 16 - Your views on mainstream music
I like a lot of mainstream music. I love pop and thats what most of it is right.


Day 17 - Your highs and lows of the past year
Highs - Finishing my placement with a good grade, getting my car, passing my driving test.

Lows - Not getting a teaching job, losing certain friends who I thought were keepers.

Day 18 - Your beliefs
Again, one I've done before. I believe in God.

Day 19 - Disrespecting parents.
What about it? Its rude. It unnatural. And it's stupid. So don't do it kids!

Day 20 - How important you think education is
LOL. I am a teacher. So how important do you think I think education is?

I AM DONE.... HOPE YOU ENJOYED, AND IF NOT NDO!x

Day 2 - Where you'd like to be in 10 years

In ten years I would like to be a successful teacher maybe even on my way to being a head, have a few kids, be married and most importantly HAPPY

x

Delirium by Lauren Oliver

Synopis: A girl called Lena lives in a world where love is a disease that can be cured. It is basically banned from the US, and if they find out you are in love, bad things happen to you. Once you turn 18, you have to have this cure, by law and at the same time are paired with their future husband who they will marry and multiply with.

This book was amaze!!!! Her first book 'Before I fall' was better, but if you are a sucker for love like me, then this book is an amazing read! It's slightly predictable, even from reading my synopsis, but not in a boring way. This book captivated me from beginning to end! And the ending was MAGICAL... exactly the right bit of suspense to keep me reading! Because apparently, this is a new trilogy. It must be read by all.

x

Day 1 - Your current relationship

I think Natasha Bedingfield pretty much sums this up for me.

'I'm single, thats where I wanna be'

x

30 day challenge

I am officially going to follow my sister and do a 30 day challenge to encourage me to start blogging again! Been so busy though...

Anyway these are the rules thingy...



x

The Voice

http://m.youtube.com/index?desktop_uri=%2F&gl=GB#/watch?v=e5K7HGxVRcs

Watch and enjoy! Christina merks as per! Wifey for life :)

P.S if the link doesnt work, search for 'the voice crazy' on youtube :)

Down...

So you know when you make a decision after a long time thinking about it, and you know its right, but it hurts? Yeah that. I made a decision like that about a month ago, and today is just one of those days where I hate myself for that decision.

Obviously, every decision has a negative consequence, but in my case the negative is overshadowing the positive today.

So I'm just feeling low. That is all.

Ciao xo

False Promises

The title of this post is a bit dramatic, but I'm being to find certain types of statements really annoying. Why do people constantly say things they don't mean? (I am guilty of this too).

For instance, I have a friend who constantly writes on my wall saying 'we need to meet up', yet never makes a move nor is interested in making it happen. Why does she continue to do this? Why not just ignore me, after all we only really speak to like 20% of our facebook contacts!

Anyways keeping it short and sweet, there is absolutely no need to say something that you don't mean. End of.

Ciao x

Who you are by Jessie J

Love this song! Lyrics are emosh...


I stare at my reflection in the mirror:
"Why am I doing this to myself?"
Losing my mind on a tiny error,
I nearly left the real me on the shelf.
No, no, no, no, no...

Don't lose who you are in the blur of the stars!
Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is believing,
It's okay not to be okay.
Sometimes it's hard to follow your heart.
Tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising,
Just be true to who you are!
(who you are [x11])

Brushing my hair, do I look perfect?
I forgot what to do to fit the mould, yeah!
The more I try the less it's working, yeah
'Cause everything inside me screams
No, no, no, no, no...

Don't lose who you are in the blur of the stars!
Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is believing,
It's okay not to be okay.
Sometimes it's hard to follow your heart.
But tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising,
There's nothing wrong with who you are!

Yes, no's, egos, fake shows, like BOOM,
Just go and leave me alone!
Real talk, real life, good luck, goodnight,
With a smile, that's my home!
That's my home, no...

No, no, no, no, no...
Don't lose who you are in the blur of the stars!
Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is believing,
It's okay not to be okay...
Sometimes it's hard to follow your heart.
Tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising,
Just be true to who you are!
yeah yeah yeah

JESSIE J lyrics are property and copyright of their owners.

Ties...

I currently blog to you from my bed, where I am suffering from i-cant-sleep-itis for the first time in months, and absolutely hating it! My mind just won't stop working overtime, so I thought it would be interesting to blog a couple of these thoughts! Btw I am blogging from my ipod touch, so please forgive me for any typos or formatting errors!

So thought number one, and the title thought of this post is ties. I increasingly wonder what in my life is tying me down to London (aside from my love for it of course). Aside from my mum and older siblings, I have no blood related family in London. I have no best friend, no boyfriend, no career as of yet, and it fills me with dread that my life could continue like this forever! I was just thinking that if I upped and left London I would only really miss my mum! So then this brought on the thought of, 'where would I go?'. Aside from moving to Nigeria to be with my best friends (my sisters) which isn't plausible, there is no point in moving anywhere else. Because believe me, we moved around a lot when I was younger, and no matter how easy they make it look on TV, it is not so easy to be the new person in town. And so, this led me to conclude that somehow, it is betterto try and make ties in my city, than put myself out in the big bad world again!

Thought number two was all about getting a teaching job. Every so often, a fear creeps up on me that I will not get a job, and this leads me into a frenzy looking for jobs! Only there are none, and job hunting is EXTREMELY boring! Anyway, this one I leave in the lords hands, and just pray that he guides me into the perfect job!

Anyway, I believe that may be enough of the ramblings of a sleep deprived 20something year old!

Ciao x

Back to blogging: Nigeria

Due to a very, very boring time of late, I have decided to start blogging again. Let's see if I actually stick to it this time!

As you all know (or are about to find out) a significant part of my genetic makeup is Nigerian. Therefore what happens in that country is very pertinent in my life.

At the moment, due to Goodluck Jonathan winning the presidential elections (yes that is our president's name, not a nickname, his actual name), the muslims/northerners are angry at the christians/southerners? (I think I've got that right). So these muslims/northerners have resorted to killing innocent christians/northerners. Makes perfect sense of course.

Anywho, it upset me that my beautiful baby sisters have to live in this place and still go about there day to day lives while all this is going on, one of them can't leave her campus because its too dangerous!

I hope that we can all keep Nigeria in our prays, pray for it to stop being such a messed up country! I love Nigeria with all my heart, it's a beautiful country that is so underrated, and its no wonder when the people that live there cannot just accept that politics will be politics and move on!